| Characters | Alexa, F'inn |
| Synopsis | F'inn confronts Alexa about a pressing question; Assumptions are made but ultimately answers are given. |
| Out-of-Character Date | February 20, 2020 |
Igen Weyr - Hatching Sands
As if temperatures in the rest of the Weyr weren't uncomfortable enough, the sands are positively blistering. The air shimmers from the onslaught of heat, leaving the area with a hallucinatory feel. Black sands stand currently empty but for the occasional egg-shard or 'print not swept clear. A raised platform of smooth stone provides a lounging-spot for queens or their mates, or a retreat for the lifemates that accompany them from whence they can cool their feet somewhat.
Summer - Month 7 of Turn 2724
F'inn needs to talk to Alexa. He does. He knows he does. Between the impromptu trip to Telgar, sudden sister-in-laws, pregnant sister-in-laws, eggs…Proddy greenriders and the constant stream of distressing news from Fort? He's been stressed. More then a little stressed and it takes him about four times as long to make his way down the tunnel to the sands as it normally would. Course, the fact that there is a conversation to be had has him pausing at the entrance, pacing a few steps while dragging his hands through his hair, and risking 'peeking' before actually setting foot out of the tunnel. One day, he will be amused about all of this. Probably. Right now, he's frustrated and annoyed, and more then a little worried. It is that that has him forcing himself out, his long legged stride carrying him toward Alexa— but not without a tensely formal nod for Raaneth and a longer glance for his own lifemate. Course, the closer he gets to to Alexa, the heavier his feet seem to become. Until, at last, he is pausing about a good five feet away and drags a hand through his hair. "Do you.. ah… Can we… Mm…" Fumbled.
At least Alexa is not a proddy, pregnant sister-in-law? So, she's at least got one thing going in her favor. But she is almost-six months pregnant and definitely feeling it. And looking it. She's also looking a bit sweaty and sticky, as one is wont to do on the Hatching Sands. Messy hair piled atop her head in a haphazard bun, she's clearly given up trying to tame it in any fashion, the loose tendrils sticking to her neck and forehead and cheeks ignored as best she can. Paperwork has been put on hold, her gaze for the eggs that are doing… frankly, nothing. They're eggs. They're pretty, but they just sit there and do egg-things like harden, silently, on the sands. Raaneth isn't even fussing with any of them (yet), though she swings her head toward the entrance at F'inn's approach, mama-protection kicking in until she identifies him as Allowed To Be Here. It draws Alexa's gaze, and while she's not surprised to see him (because he's probably here a lot), there's a funny little furrow in her brow for the expression on his face and the hand through his hair. And the fumbling of words, which get an arched eyebrow; skeptical and amused at the same time. "Can we what?" she wonders, prompting. "Talk?" She assumes. Because she's pretty sure he's not asking her out.
"Yeah," the word is breathed as F'inn drops into a seat and exhales a gusty breath. Unfortunately, for a few long moments that is all he does, his own gaze sweeping toward the eggs to stare in awkward silence. It is only a low sound of encouragement from the bronze that has his head twisting back around to regard Alexa (Because Nym insists that looking at her when speaking is only polite) that F'inn sighs and rests his arms atop his thighs. "So… um." Yeah. Getting to it? Not as easy as he might like. Not when he is utterly certain that anything that he says is probably going to be taken the wrong way, entirely. "I just thought we should talk about.. you know.. and when…you know.." No, F'inn, she doesn't know, particularly since you are giving almost no information. Course, he realizes that and sighs, dragging his hand through his hair again as he exhales a low sound of frustration. "You don't like me very much," he points out. "I know. I mean, I get it." He doesn't. Not at all. "But I still.. I mean, I want to be /involved/." Closer, F'inn. Closer.
Looking at Alexa is probably a good idea. Particularly if this is meant to be a serious conversation. Of course, it means the goldrider can't make faces or roll her eyes or do anything else that would be highly in appropriate of a woman who claims to be an adult. She will, however, give him all the slightly-sarcastic side-eyes as he both confirms his intention to talk, and then promptly falls into silence. Sigh. She might just go back to egg-watching herself, until that twist and sigh and 'so, um' have her once more regarding the bronzerider. This time, both eyebrows lift, a very 'so, um?' answered in return, albeit without the words. "Uhh… No?" comes in frankly confused return. "I'm absolutely sure I have no idea what you're talking about." But then there are legit words that form sentences that she actually comprehends, though it does little to alleviate the confusion. "Uh…" Really, this is not going well for anyone, and now there's an almost wariness from the goldrider as she scoot-scoots a little higher on Raaneth's leg. "You might need to be a little more specific? Or actually, no. Please. Don't get more specific," she decides, eyeing him like he might have grown a second head. "You have a weyrmate. And he's apparently my half-brother. And even if he wasn't, I'm not really into the whole threesome thing." Clearly, they have two very different ideas about what F'inn is trying to say.
F'inn blinks, the look on his face comical as regards her and gives a quick shake of his head. "No! No, no… That's not.." Drawing in a shallow breath, he brushes his tongue over his lips, exhaling a gusty sigh as he returns his hands to resting atop his thighs. "That's not.. I want to be involved with the baby," he finally gets out. "I'm sorry, I feel like I manage to piss you off every time I try to…" Talk, breath? He doesn't know really. "And I get that you can handle it all yourself. I do. I know /you/ don't need some dopey bronzerider around trying to take care of you or anyone else. And that is /not/ what I am doing," he adds quickly. "But kids are important to me, Alexa. I don't.. I have one other and we're very involved in Fig's life. I just…" Trailing off, he shakes his head and grimaces at his own awkwardness.
Alexa's look is heavily laden with suspicion. But she lets F'inn talk, and Raaneth isn't growling, so it's safe to say they both believe him when he clarifies what he wants to be involved with. Even if she's still hitting him with those judgmental eyes. "You're right," she agrees. "I don't need anyone to take care of me — bronzerider or otherwise." For a moment she lets that statement hang in the air, arms crossed and fingers drumming gently against her arm. It's not defensive so much as thoughtful. Thinking. Debating. "But you're wrong if you think I don't want you involved with the baby." It comes with a sigh, and a relaxing of her own posture; sinking back against Raaneth and letting her hands fall to rest over her (somewhat pronounced beneath those flowy robes) baby bump. This time, it's the goldrider's gaze that goes skittering toward somewhere else; once more watching the eggs even if they're doing absolutely nothing interesting. "It's good for kids to know they're loved. And he will be," she adds, assigning gender to an unborn baby because she's already had a son, and it's just easier to assume this is also a son. "He will be so loved, even if you don't want to be the one to love him. But you know… it would be nice if you did." Want to love him. "That's why I told you in the first place."
F'inn immediately relaxes to the point that the relief on his face might be comical if it were not so blatantly honest. "I already love him," he assures with a flashing smile. "Or her. I.. it means a /lot/ to us," he admits. "I mean, I want to bring Fig to stay with his granddads and play with his brother and.. They have an island you know?" The statement flies past his lips with a broad smile and a shift of weight as he settles more comfortably in the sand. "We just built a cabin there, ourselves. If.. you know, you didn't mind hanging out with a bunch of men, I'm sure N'sir would be /thrilled/ to have the whole family there to play in the sun. I just…" Trailing off, he falls silent for a long moment, before turning a serious look up to Alexa's face. "Just cause I offer to help… I don't think you're helpless, I never did. So, if I insulted you, that was never my intention."
Alexa does not laugh. There might even be some shared relief, even if she's quick to hide it. It's the rush of words — Fig and brother and island and family — that have her mute again, pink lips pressed into a tight little line as she keeps her thoughts in her head even if they're not free of her face. Not displeased so much as… guarded. A strain around the eyes and a sort of chin-jutted stubbornness that is entirely unnecessary but comes regardless. She even manages a tense but almost pleasant, "That sounds nice," for the mention of cabins and playing in the sun. Even if she's not about to agree to any such thing. It's the apology that has her gaze sharpening once again, green eyes narrowed as she studies the bronzerider with a look that might just feel familiar (apparently, that 'microscope inspection' look was genetic). "Not everyone wants help," is what she eventually says. It's not really an 'it's fine' or anything close to it, but at least she says it politely enough. "Sometimes you come across as like… I dunno. The way you say things just comes out wrong." Or she takes it wrong. Not that Alexa is going to accept the blame on it.
"I don't know your sons name," F'inn admits quickly. "But he's family to, the island is more then big enough for boys to romp and play under the watchful eyes of the dragons." Falling silent as he watches her, he affords a slow dip of his chin in an understanding nod. "I get that," he assures. "And I am trying to be less….less," he ends with. "Just please know that, at no point, am I ever calling your ability into question. I mean, I can't imagine the amount of nonsense you have to put up with. I certainly don't intend to add to it. And," he adds as he shifts in his seat and starts to roll to his feet. "I'm get before I ruin a good thing. Thank you for hearing me out. Really."
A tight little smile comes at the mention of Alexa's other child. "Jaxyn," she offers after a moment of thought. But it's a strained sort of offering; a guarded thing. Like maybe Alexa isn't sure she wanted to give up the name of her first born. It takes a moment or two before she speaks again, and when she does the tone is carefully chosen, the words an intentional mimicry of his previous offering. "It is not my intention to insult you," she starts. "But I'm not sure how else to say this." Deep breath. "I am not looking for a family. I love N'sir. He's like…" A brother? A mother? She's not sure how to finish that, and so she doesn't. "I know you will be in my life because of him." The baby. "But I am not… I'm not looking to belong to somewhere. I already belong. I have A'eyr. I have Raaneth. I have Jaxyn and I have this one," she continues, hand gentle on her belly. "You seem very determined to make me part of your family, and I am going to politely ask that you… stop." Whether it is well received or not, she seems done discussing it, a little nod of her head offered in acceptance of his leaving. "Sure," comes for the last, not a dismissal so much as an acceptance. "Tell your weyrmate Hi…" Or don't. She's not sure which would be better. Either way, with F'inn leaving, Alexa's going to wiggle down and try to take a nap.
