All the Thinking

Characters Alekzandyr, Alexa
Synopsis Alek and Alexa discuss their thoughts and feelings after their first experiencing touching the eggs.
Out-of-Character Date April 6, 2019

Igen Weyr - Star Stones
A flat notch on the eastern rim of the bowl, this area is only large enough for two dragons to comfortably rest. Its primary purpose is long past, although the ancient star stones remain. Cut from the native sandstone and inset with metal so many ages ago to frame the pulsing red star above on the eve of a pass. The stone is ever so slowly eroding from the elements, but is nowhere near collapse. Never again shall the finger and eye rocks to align with that dreaded celestial body. Now this area serves mainly as the lonely watchdragons perch. The view from is spectacular. The bowl spreads out below to one side, and beyond that are seen the low weathered mountains and the shimmering yellow deserts. A small shed topped with a solar panel located against the rising rim of the bowl provides an air conditioned area for a rider to rest out of the heat of the day. A door in the stone wall near the shed leads to a winding spiral staircase that links many lengths below to the series of inner caverns. The view may be epic, but transport by rider is much more convenient than those winding endless stairs.

From the hatching cavern, Alek heads most direct to the star stones, filled to the brim with the desire to be out in the open with air against his skin. There is no looking back, but not because he was dismissing his sister, rather because he was confident she would know to follow. There is overwhelming relief to find the two dragon lookout vacant for whatever reason, be it break time or change of shift, because quickened steps carry him over to one side in order to take hold of the partition and just take in a few slow deep breaths. Eyes closed and face upturned towards the sky. All in an effort not to empty the contents of his stomach all over whatever or whomever happened to be below. Really, he only needed a few moments. Honest.

Basket on her arm, Alexa is definitely following. Glad for the cool kiss of evening air against her skin, the desert night promising a chill even if the day is unbearably hot, she's quick to keep pace with her retreating brother. While there might not be words shared between them on the journey, her hand slips out to pinch at the back of his shirt. It is a typical habit, particularly when she is reading. But it is also a silent statement of solidarity. She is here and she is not leaving. She very literally has his back. It falls away once they are at the top of the Weyr. Alexa lets Alek move take his space while she settles the basket and crouches beside it, rifling through the contents. With thermos in hand, she slips over to stand beside him and silently offer over some water to sip.

Alek could certainly feel Alexa's hold on the fabric of his tunic, of course finding that very familiar contact both comforting and reassuring as they ascend the steep stairs, however noting the loss as she releases her touch but driven forward regardless by necessity. Hands to stone, head tipped upwards, the healer apprentice does nothing but stand, grip, and breathe. In that passage of time he admittedly unaware of Alexa's position, but as he feels that wave of nausea finally starting to pass he can feel her beside him almost immediately. At some point he exhales rougher than the rest before, swallowing dryly and braving a glance towards his twin, green eyes dropped to her offering and one that he partakes of. Reaching over with one hand that was almost steady again, he takes the thermos from her and lifts it to his lips as to take mall, careful sips, with notable stretches of pause between, unwilling to risk anything more. He remains close to her though, very much in her personal space, until such a time as he can recap the thermos and return it, "Thank you," he exhales, leaning into the wall.

A murmured, "Welcome," comes in return, Alexa quick to tuck the thermos beneath her arm so that she can reach out with the other to rub at his back. "Are you alright?" Now that the silence is broken, she's not going to try and get it back. There's concern in her gaze, wild and wide-eyed as she might be herself after the events on the sands, it is her brother's predicament that has her attention rather than her own emotional state. "That was…" but there are no words. Because how does one describe such a thing. "You're not going to be sick, are you?"

Alekzandyr hmm's and nods slowly, thankful for the caring attention to his state of being as well as the affection felt in the rub of her hand against his back, and takes a few moments in which to just close his eyes again and try to burn some of what he felt and saw from his mind. Ultimately, he's unsuccessful, those thoughts and images seemingly seared into the meat of his brain, "I'm okay," he murmurs, his gaze locked onto her face and taking in her countenance, lips drawn into the smallest semblance of a frown. There was little doubt that Alexa would have been much the same affected by their experience on the hatching sands, but seeing compared to knowing, was a whole different animal. "Are you?" comes none-too-long after, idly brushing some stray strands of blonde from her face that had caught themselves at the corner of her mouth. The adjective adequate enough to describe just what exactly happened back there, eluded him, but Alek nods in confirmation all the same. Yes, that was…something…all right.
The next sound out of him is an approximation of a laugh, but it's unsure and a little flat. "Doing my best not to," he replies honestly, "I wasn't expecting…" Well, any of that really. He'd heard to stories and the warnings, however they'd hardly done the reality any justice.

"I'm alright. I think." No one bothered to warn Alexa of those terrible eggs. But even if they had, it's doubtful she would have listened. They're just *eggs*! Or so she thought. "Me neither," she adds, a shiver running down her back for the memory of it all. "The last one… that one was nice. It was… really nice." Nice enough that she can't help but smile at the memory, almost giddy with it. "But the first?" That one has her biting her lip and turning her eyes toward the horizon. "I don't want to think about that one." And so she won't. Or, she'll try not to. "What did you… see?" she wonders.

There is some relief to hear that Alexa was okay, or rather that she thought she was. The apprentice healer had made a visual assessment and knowing his sister as he did, he was fairly confident that this was the case, in the long run anyway. Warned or no, it was fairly obvious both of them had been taken by surprise, though the paleness of Alek's eyes turn towards the girl at his side as she recants the most positive aspect of what they'd just experienced. The smile he returns for hers is faint but nontheless pleased for her. At least one of them had something good happen to them out there, "I'm glad," he says softly, brushing his hand over her hair before pulling her in for a one armed hug. Mostly because Alexa had gone on to speak about the first egg she'd touched, "So, don't. Tell me about the last one." Details were everything, especially if they were pleasant ones. Alek tosses his gaze out in the general direction she had, his expression darkening. "It wasn't so much what I saw," he admits with a frown,
"It was the feelings stirred up, the questions asked I don't have answers for, and being mentally stripped naked and exposed to have everything about me scrutinized. I had no control…" His voice thickening towards the end, he shakes his head and seals his lips, giving Alexa another squeeze, this time for that aforementioned solidarity.

"I know." It's not a platitude. Alexa literally knows, because, "That's how the first one felt." Striped bare. Judged. Challenged and questioned and ultimately dismissed… It sends a shiver down her spine and inspires a bite of her cheek to tap down unwelcome emotions. "The last one though…" she continues, a deep breath taken as she wills herself to focus on that final egg. The 'good' one. "The last one was the total opposite of the first. It was so… nice. The feelings… It was all love, and acceptance. I felt wanted, and perfect and adored. Not… not in an idle-worship way," she adds with a faint shake of her head, wanting to get it right. "Just in a way that felt… real. I don't know how to describe it better than that," she admits, snorting a moment later when she adds, "And I'm a freakin' Harper." Tucked in at Alek's side, she keeps her gaze to the horizon but leans her cheek against his shoulder, taking comfort from the only family she has — the most important family she has. "It was just an egg," she says at last, though whether she means the good one, the bad one, or all of them, she doesn't specify.

Alek would have joined his twin in shuddering, but he was doing everything within his power not to think about how those eggs had made him feel and none of it what he would have considered good. There were nine eggs, perhaps he just hadn't touched the right one yet. Clearly Alexa had found one that suited her and while he could appreciate and understand how that loving and adoring egg made her feel good, that sort of intimacy with anyone other than his sister, seemed alien to him. Boys, girls, he'd had a few confess their feelings in the last couple of turns, but felt no answering attachment to any of them outside of physical attraction. It might have bothered him at first, but it hadn't taken long for him to conclude that he didn't need anyone other than Alexa. His love for her was absolute, and would remain unconditional for as long as he breathed in and out. "Like the way we feel for each other," he tacts onto the end with a nod. He totally got what she was trying to say. There comes a soft chuckle for the reminder of her craft, light and airy, tapering off into silence without any further comment on it. For a few moments they stand together with the horizon stretched across their gaze, holding Alexa gently against him and taking great comfort in that physical contact, as he always did when she was close. As if she were the only home and piece of mind that he would ever need. "Yeah," Alek rubs his hand up and down the thinness of Alexa's arm, trying to make those words she'd just spoken soothe the trouble that'd been stirred within his own head, post first touching, "Focus on the last one Allie, put the rest out of your mind."

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